martes, diciembre 24, 2013

Doctor, doctor.

Mi cómic corto 'Doctor, doctor' ya está a la venta y si quieres puedes comprarlo online en la web de ¡Caramba! o en algunas tiendas. Toda la información aquí:
http://carambacomics.com/catalogo/tebeos/doctordoctor/

miércoles, diciembre 18, 2013

Cocinando. /// Cooking.

Translation:

'Mother, I'm back from school. What are you cooking?'
'Boiled feces, don't you smell it? I've been all morning cooking like a motherfucking bitch.'
'I've cooked poop.' 

'I've cooked my own shit.'

domingo, noviembre 24, 2013

Pendientes. /// Earrings.

Translation:

Here's your present, grandma.
Oh, what's this? Thank you so much!

They're earrings that I made. With dog fetuses.

Let's see! How do I look?

You look horrible.


viernes, noviembre 08, 2013

Triciclo. /// Tricycle.

Translation:

Dear, that's wrong! Don't do that again!

You can't kill your best friend...

...dismantle him and, using advanced surgery techniques...

...build the most awesome tricycle I've seen in my life!

domingo, septiembre 15, 2013

Tú no

Translation:

I love your necklace, what is it?

It's a piece of my boyfriend's ass.

When I touch it, I feel closer to him.

No, you can't touch it!

sábado, agosto 17, 2013

Best parents ever. /// Los mejores padres del mundo.


Translation:

Dear, your friend did not die! In fact, he's alive! And he wants to see you!

Hi, friend! How are you! I have missed you so much!

There was an accident, but I didn't die. Do you want to play videogames, like we always do?

What have you done...? Dad, is that you?

Don't be silly! Don't you recognize my face? I'm your best friend, and I don't want you to be sad because of me!

Hug me! Hug me!

jueves, junio 13, 2013

La psicóloga honesta. /// The honest psychologist.

Translation:

No one loves me because I'm fat.

You should eat less.

Thank you. See you next time.

La psicóloga honesta. /// The honest psychologist.


Translation:

My husband thinks I dress like a slut.

It's not just him. We all think you dress like a slut.

Thank you. See you next time.

lunes, junio 10, 2013

Negligencia. /// Negligence.

Translation:


Madam, sometimes when performing surgery surgeons leave small objects inside the patient's body.

One of our doctors left an object inside your head.

Good news, doctor Perkins! We've found your iPad!

Mascota de interior. /// Indoor pet.

Translation:

Madam, I think your pet is very sick.

No, no! Hahahahahahahahaha! This is not my pet!
My pet is inside!

Come out, pretty.

Who loves mommy?
Come on, kiss mommy! Kiss mommy!

Bicicleta.


viernes, junio 07, 2013

Empatía. /// Empathy.


Translation:

When my wife got sick, I realized that I needed to feel what she was feeling. So I shaved all my body and started to dress like her. I want her to know that we are together in this. We are a team, and we are going to win.

You do it so you can dress... like a woman.

Oh my God, how dare you?

Please, stop...

We are going to beat this sickness.

martes, mayo 28, 2013

Promesa. /// A promise.


Para O.M.F.G.F.A.C.E.P.A.L.M.S.L.U.R.P.
Por favor, visita O.M.F.G.F.A.C.E.P.A.L.M.S.L.U.R.P.
Please, visit O.M.F.G.F.A.C.E.P.A.L.M.S.L.U.R.P. 



Translation:
 

Honey... you have to promise... cof, cof... you will go on without me. I really want you to be happy...

You will like my friend Ana.
Here's her number.
You'll make a great couple.

She knows you like anal sex.
And she will give you a lot of blowjobs when you are in a bad mood.

Oh, and her tits. Cof, cof... You have to see her amazing tits, round and firm. You will love them.






Pereza. /// Laziness.

Laziness. /// Pereza.
2013

Translation:

Oh my God! It says here the baby was due in 1993!

I'm really sorry... I'm very lazy....

What now?

domingo, mayo 26, 2013

Raquisectomía. /// Raquisectomy.


Translation:

Madam, we had to perform a raquisectomy.

In other words: we removed your spine from your body.

Frankly, you'd be better off dead.

How much do I owe you, doctor?

martes, mayo 21, 2013

My new friend. /// Mi nuevo amigo.


Translation:

Son, you have to start drawing more realistically.

But mom, my new friend is exactly like that!

Come in, don't be afraid.

Good morning, madam.

jueves, mayo 16, 2013

Preocupada. /// Worried.

Translation:

Mom, I'm very worried.

It's been two days since I've heard anything from him.

I don't know. I have a bad feeling about this.

domingo, mayo 12, 2013

Oh, capitán, mi capitán. /// Oh captain, my captain!

Translation:

Even the most unmotivated students admitted that Mr. Perkins had caught their attention.

viernes, mayo 10, 2013

Pobreza. /// Poverty.

Translation:

Let's do it! Let's do it, dude!

Yeah honey! Jump! We are so crazy!

Woooooooooo...!!!!

Mpuffff...

miércoles, mayo 01, 2013

Coche humano. /// Human car.

Translation:

Hey, honey!

Oh my God, it's the most masculine thing I've seen in my life!

Do you want to touch my masculine and rough hair?

Yes, please.

Yes, honey, touch my hair.

Oh, yeah, honey. Broom broom.

Get lost in my hair.